Saturday, June 28, 2008
Healing effect of music
The concert was fabulous - Gyorgy has ***such*** a good touch, the notes just come
out like a stream of water under moonlight, it just flows... Every note crystal
clear and with some kind of pure intent... He is very young and some of that innocence, joy and whatever else is just felt in what he is playing, it just is so ... gentle.
I could just feel my heart opening and becoming warm and fuzzy and me feeling normal
again.... It feels like flying.
ps - he is from and lives in Budapest.
PPS - And, classical music is proven to reduce blood pressure by 20%... A local surgeon played it before every surgery with great results...
Sunday, June 22, 2008
is Santa real?
I said: hm, I cannot tell you and ruin it for you. You need to find out for yourself.
She said: well then, I don't think Santa is real. Me and my siblings got tons of gifts from Santa, and mom and dad got like only one gift. So Santa cannot be real.
I said: wow, that's very wise. Indeed, if Santa is so partial, then something is fishy. Some adults say that he is not real, but even then, whatever exists in our imagination is real.
So here I am, "freshly arrived to Earth" and noticing how life on Earth has a lot to do with suffering. It seems like any time things start moving towards being more conscious, there is something that will try to squish it and bring it back into the suffering state. No organizations love true creativity and self identity, because it means chaos in the "normal" sense of word. So, schools, families, churches, companies, etc. all try to keep enjoyment in check.
But then I realized that EACH human does it to themselves!!!! Everyone tries to complicate their life to the point where it gets all muddy and suffering. Amazing... Pleasure is a no-no. Clarity, simplicity, etc. are all *intentionally and actively* AVOIDED.
(Of course, it is easy to notice something like this when others do it. But how about me? I need to observe myself.)
Phoenicia Pathwork Lectures talk about "negative pleasure". Other spiritual teachings talk about it too. Basically, an unhealed human being takes pleasure in negativity. Gurdjieff calls it "enjoying touching the sore place in our mouth with our tongue."
Negativity is what we are used too... that's what we are trained in, by all the asleep adults that we grow up with. The bad habits just get passed on. Gurdjieff talks about that, and how for us to see ourselves and all our lies and negativity would make us stark mad => and only the process of self observation peels off all that, and it takes time...
Also, when we try to wake up our consciousness a little, all our old habits "wake up" too and try to bring us back into the negative state. Yogananda talks about that.
So what is the solution? Yogananda said:
"First, you need to understand the forces you have to contend with. Every action you perform - physically or mentally - leaves a trace on your mind. Yoga calls them samsaras - the habit-tendencies or predisposed moods created by the things you have already done, whether in this life or previous incarnation. Whenever you try to break out of the mold and accomplish something constructive or new, immediatelly your past wrong actions try to nullify your present good efforts. But if you keep on trying, and concentrating, that power of concentrated thought will obvert your past actions that are trying to keep you down."
The key is MEDITATION. That's concentration to connect with God. God is the only being that has the solution for our wholeness. Ask and ye shall receive.
The sound of drums is also quite hypnotic, and puts one into a different space, where we cannot "think" in an ordinary sense. In that space, we have to Think and be Aware and yet totally Surrender. The dance is such that it is possible to do it only when we Think with something Higher inside us, when we are totally Alert yet completely Relaxed. It just flows... being in the moment.
I had such experiences today, and it was amazing to fall into that groove. That groove is something that is our birthright. It is an active yet meditative state. The state in which everything is clear and every moment lasts an eternity. Have you experienced such states?
What I experienced today was that feeling of turning the control to the body for the things it knows how to do - it knows how to jump, move, turn, etc.. The mind just interferes when it tries to control the body. In our ordinary life, the mind interferes a lot. That's why we don't move our bodies properly and that's why we end up with pain.
Another thing I experienced today was operating without that control of that ego that always thinks, judges, calculates, etc. My mind was very active, yet quiet, allowing me to do all the acrobatics necessary for the dance and to enjoy it.
It felt like I was flying on the drum music, like a kite on the wind made by the notes. I could feel the drum music inside me and It was moving me. I didn't have to think - my body knew exactly how to move with that music. The Thinking that was happening was just to tell me: ok, now the coreography says we move left and turn twice. But it wasn't "thinking" in a regular sense. It was more like ... some inner coach that was very discreet and quiet and accurate. And then I felt the music and moved with it.
The feeling was of being inside my body. I know it sounds rather strange to think so highly of being inside one's body, but: when was the last time you were inside your body? It's not something that happens all the time! Most of the time, we are stuck in our head. So, being in my body today felt marvelous.
So, feeling inside my body, it felt like I was occupying an enourmous amount of space. What I noticed is that my world view shifted: instead of constantly monitoring my environment for external threat and danger, I was on the inside of my body and staying there. My attention was inside me and outside of me, not only outside. That is a subtle but important difference. I was PRESENT.
And since I was Present, everything felt different. The sense of space, sound, other people, etc. - everything became more enhanced, more vivid, and somehow closer yet the space became much much larger.
I was just dancing for the sheer joy of it. I didn't care what I looked, what other people thought, I just *d*a*n*c*e*d, moving my body and enjyoing the sense of freedom in my whole being.
It is very difficult to describe this - just go out and do it. Try dancing with the drums and totally relax into it, and you will find out what I mean.
Watch "The Visitor" movie to see what drums does to stiffness :)
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Being in tune with God
Then I had to drive off to work.
Later in the day, I begun to notice all the beautiful things around me. I noticed the flowers, the people, the sky, and I was feeling joyous and happy and enjoying it all. Someone sent me photos of hummingirds and it made me squeel in joy, they were soooo cute! Little puff balls perched on flowers....
I came home and realized that my prayer has been answered. Something did get me in touch with God, and I was feeling rapture, joy, appreciation, bliss, gratitude, and all that.
How close prayers are.... just ASK.
Monday, June 2, 2008
Bowen therapy, shiatsu, etc.
Anyways, the class was 2 days. I came in with a pain in my shoulder and otherwise feeling fine. The shoulder felt better. But my foot started hurting. Something got out of place while people were practicing Bowen on me. The instructor worked on my foot, and it did feel better, for about several hours.
A kind of modality where a beginners' class can make one hurt is not really safe, in my opinon. Perhaps the inventor of Bowen therapy was God guided, so he knew what he was doing, but a general "canned" Bowen session obviously can be harmful.
The foot pain got worse, it stayed for a week. UNTIL I worked on my pelvis and really **stretched** it. The pain was coming from the pelvis, not from the foot. As my lomi teacher already demonstrated - she worked on my pelvis and in 10 minutes I was pain free FOR GOOD, after 1 yr of limping...
It seems to me that no bodywork really works without stretching....
The shoulder pain that Bowen kinda subdued really didn't go away. (Remember, a chiropractor yanked my neck and injured me.) I showed a friend a few shiatsu moves with stretching and pressing into tight areas. My friend said that I had a hard ball, "like a cyst" in the shoulder, and he really pressed into some key areas, as I guided him, all the way down my back. Then I showed him how to stretch the arm. Basically, he did on me what I'd do on someone else. After that work voila! my shoulder felt completely different, everything went back into place, the tissue had a different quality, more even, and I felt GREAT.
In working with people, I am beginning to see certain patterns.
First, some problems do need to be addressed with rolfing-like moves. If it is deeply tight, etc. Some problems need to be stretched - I suppose almost anything. Some need to be gently melted. I find Bowen useful to start relaxing very tight areas. I also find that going in with shiatsu/rolfing moves really resolves the problem, instead of just feeling relief for a while.
And that brings me to the next point: deep tissue work is more life changing than just Bowen. Bowen seems to work on people who cannot stand inner work and being challenged.
Which is ok - I use it on children, on elderly, and on people who are not very spiritual. Also, anyone with really really tight areas.
Shiatsu and lomi have been around for a very very long time, they are true and tested, and I can see why. It really works.
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