Thursday, April 3, 2008

Being in the NOW

My friend has a bad habit of bailing out on his friends, and particularly girlfriends. Obviously, it is hard for him to keep a relationship going, right? So, he'd like to change it.

So, what does he do? Carefully monitors himself to catch when his "bailer" comes out, and then tries to squish it.

Will it work?

No. When we try to "squish" something it never gets squished, it just keeps on growing. We feed the monster.

The way to go is to just OBSERVE it. Without any attempt to change it. Just watch it. Carefully, atentively, neutrally. Just be cool and watch it.

That will diminish it.

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Monday, March 31, 2008

Being in the NOW

One of my clients has a little girl, maybe about 7 yrs old.

Several days ago, I saw her. She said that she cut her foot on the coral reef, it was hurting quite bad, and she had bandaids on.

Today, I saw her again. I didn't see any bandaids, but I wanted to be "nice" so I asked her how is her foot doing? She just looked at me, smiffed.


That was a huge lesson in how healthy children process the world and how we, adults, should too:
anything that was not important and/or painful is forgotten, and you don't bring it back, you just don't talk about it. No carrying the past around. It is all gone!

What matters is NOW.

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